Friday, April 15, 2011


Tahoe our English Angora doe has not kindled as of yet. I am trying not to cause to much static energy around her and am limiting my "peeking" into her nest to a minimum. I hope she is able to be a good first time Mom. You know quite a few of us are not. Like me for example. I was hovering over my first child (almost 20 years ago) every few minutes. I slept next to her crib, hardly slept and checked to make sure she was breathing every chance I could. I worried about her pee and poop and the right kind of diapers. I boiled everything that she might put in her mouth. All she has to do is make a little whimper and I was there ready to change, then feed, then change, then rock her back to sleep. Sounds like a good Mother right? Not really. I should have slept when she slept. I should have let her whimper and wait to see if perhaps she would go back to sleep. Speaking of sleep, I was doing her no favors by rocking her to sleep, then placing her in the crib. She really needed to learn how to be peaceful and find slumber on her own terms. There was plenty of other time for rocking. Plenty. I was too tense, too worried, too much. The result: a tired, stressed out Mom. Was that good? I tell you, by my second child and even more so with my third, I was relaxed and so were my babies. I hope I can somehow translate this to Tahoe. Embrace her with this energy and wisdom all the while I am out with a flashlight at 2 am and 50 mph gusts of wind blasting over the mountain blowing at me while I pull back the layers and peek in at her nest... again.  ~crow

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